What the Pens could be announcing today
So, it's pretty much a lock that the Pens will be announcing today that the 2012 Entry Draft will take place at CONSOL Energy Center next summer. This cat's been out of the bag since we got tipped by a source back on July 26 of this year.
But, still, there is some room for speculation on what will be announced today. We have put together a list of shit we hope the Pens will be announcing today. Read More for the list...
-There will now be a Sheetz inside CONSOL beside the Rita's Italian Ice stand. This would be a huge move for the organization. MTOs would skyrocket to exorbitant prices, and teenagers with chains attached to their wallets do everything in their power not to make eye contact with the two cops there because they are stoned.
-Dan Rooney of the Steelers joins the press conference, as he and Lemieux announce that all player-personnel decisions for both franchises will now be made by @MadChad412 on Twitter, since he possesses a rare quality of being able to talk knowledgeably about the Penguins and the Steelers; one of only 7 people in the tri-state area who can claim this. The other 6 in the running for the position didn't play sports in high school or college, so they are not qualified.
-Brooks Laich sucks.
-A Penguins Fan Police Department has officially been assembled. First order of business: fans with signs saying they heart a player and/or a marriage proposal to a player are kicked out of the arena, banned for life, and possibly shot.
-Gary Glitter is the goal song again.
-The Kiss Cam will feature one gay couple per game.
-The team is now known as The Pittsburgh Penguins presented by Old Navy.
-Mario Lemieux announces Student Rush is back on a permanent basis. David Morehouse shoots Lemieux with a tranquilizer dart.
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