Snow Job. PENS LOSE.
The locker room was a M*A*S*H unit.
A.O. was dancing around.
You had to walk out of the Arena after this defeat and mother nature is on her period.
Your car is warming up, the parking lot is a bigger mess than an episode of Monk,
it is cold as balls, and you don't know what the deal with Crosby is.
Welcome to the real 2008-09 season.
God help us all.
joey l.
travis
slush
The Caps still haven't shown up for the first half of the opening period.
The Pens came roaring out of the gate with a 2-on-1 and a Bing breakaway.
Crosby didn't even score on a breakaway at the 8th-grade picnic.
Brashear quantum leaps into Godard and high-sticks Letang.
4 minutes of PP on the way.
As soon as the Pens started generating some shit on that, the Caps had another one in the box.
The ensuing 5-on-3 turned into a 5-on-2 when a Cap lost a stick. No dice.
Matt Bradley and his slew foot on Malkin spelled breakaway, but MAF came flying out to thwart it.
Bombing on this extended power play would have been unreal, but Malkin's one-time slapper is more unrealer.
1-0.
Pens fans everywhere vomited on themselves when Crosby and Kozlov got tangled up, and Crosby went limping to the locker room, if it's possible to limp on skates.
He was back soon.
The Caps felt slighted, coach John Goodman let the refs know about it, so there was gonna be some make-up calls coming.
They came at the end of the period when Orpik goes to the bin, then Malkin jobs Ovechkin.
Why doesn't Scuderi go off, too, for cross-checking Ovechkin? Because he's a beast.
And because he had a tiny 5-on-3 to kill.
Maybe he should have went to the box because he took a slapshot to the forehead on the eventual 5-on-4 kill. What a player. He should be the face of the NHL.
At least he didn't give the fans a thumbs-up when he was leaving the ice. Joke.
Solid first.
Tried having sex with our girlfriends, but all we get is an E_NOLOGIN_ACCESS error.
We know how it feels.
This isn't crap. The "intermission" title was gay.
The Caps got a big goal to kick off the second. Knucklepuck. 1-1.
The Caps continued to dictate the play for a good portion of the game after that.
Dustin Jeffrey snapped the crowd out of it as he streaked down the wing all alone.
Theordore stops it and gets a quick whistle.
If you want to know what the Pens have been missing all year, Talbot and Kennedy brought it to lunch.
They cycle down deep. Kennedy makes everything happen behind the net.
Talbot one-timer, rebound to Satan.
2-1.
Seriously a big goal for the sake of the entire team. If Satan is pissed for being demoted from the top two lines, a cheapo goal like that gets him pumped again.
The Caps eventually tied it, with the Red Sea parting for Semin to tap in a backdoor pass from Fedorov.
2-2.
The rest of the second was mud until Ovechkin realized he couldn't catch Crosby and laid him into the boards when Bing let up for him.
Cooke went to send Ovechkin a message, and the ref calls a penalty.
Awful call. Big PK was on the way.
The Pens had to kill a 5-on-3 for a little when Hal Gill broke Fedorov's stick.
They killed half of that Gill penalty, but the third period awaited.
Big time movie.
The third period was like getting tea-bagged by Meatloaf.
For the second time of the game, the Caps got the jump on the Pens at the start of a period.
It helps when you get three power plays in a row.
Ovechkin city. 3-2.
A.O. taunts the Pens bench. Errey wanted to fight him.
At least one of the refs knew the Pens were primed for a PP.
The Pens had a call coming, and Fleury was pulled.
Bing stickhandles through traffic and saucers it to Whitney.
Whitney steps into an unreal shot. 3-3.
Huge goal.
Right after that, Theodore tries to hit Carrot with a puck. Delay of game.
No dice on the PP.
The Caps got their own PP right away. boom. 4-3.
Uh...boom again.
5-3.
Ovechkin took over the game. He still hates America.
If there is a worse sound than him screaming, we don't know what it is.
Being down a defenseman had officially caught up to the Pens.
Pens still have some chances. But head coach John Goodman calls a timeout.
Insert your own caption on this one.
The last glimmer of hope for the Pens resided in a late power play.
Killed. They get another one. Killed.
Crosby goes down in there somewhere. Doesn't look good. But Crosby said this:
"I don't think it's too bad," Crosby said. "We'll see [today]. I haven't seen [the replay], but it felt pretty bad. Hopefully, all goes well."
If we didn't have bad luck, we'd have feces.
Some joke from way downtown into the empty net. 6-3. Game.
MISCELLANEOUS
- Never seen two players like Malkin and A.O. hate each other like this. Incredible.
- Pens played better than the score indicates.
- A.O. is insane.
- Joe Theodore is a disaster waiting to happen.
- Weathermen better get their stories straight. C.S. Keys wouldn't have let this happen.
C-BLOG
- If you type in a long "word" in a comment, some browsers don't know to insert a linebreak where our template ends, so you'll see the page get really wide if someone does what BlacknGold66 did:
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If you see it happen, just edit your comment a little, or better yet, we can edit for you. woooo
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